A New Way Of Dealing With A Breakup

As part of my newsletter, The Breakthrough Letter, every week I send out a short email with one idea, one suggestion, and one resource to help you break through your breakup and create a new possibility for love, either with your ex or someone new.

Here’s this week’s edition. Enjoy.

Today’s Idea:

All that positive breakup bs you’ve been consuming? …The “trust the process,” “listen to your intuition” and “everything happens for a reason” garbage?

It’s keeping you stuck. Real stuck…

I know you want to hear that you’re perfect and your ex just couldn’t see it. That if you just think positive thoughts and make a vision board and do affirmations, everything will work out — you’ll be happy again and maybe they’ll be back in your arms if that’s your goal.

But here’s the thing: you probably screwed up too and it’s okay to be upset right now. In fact, you should be upset. Because pretending you weren’t part of the problem is exactly why you might still be obsessing over someone who perhaps doesn’t even care about you anymore.

Today’s Suggestion:

This week, stop trying to eliminate your pain and start engaging with it honestly.

When heartbreak hits again, ask yourself the uncomfortable questions: Why did your ex actually leave? What could you have done better? Why do you keep checking their Instagram at 2 AM?

Write down your answers without the usual ego-protecting bullshit. Be brutally honest about your role in the relationship’s downfall. Maybe you were clingy. Maybe you were emotionally unavailable. Maybe you turned every disagreement into a fight.

Then pick one specific behavior you identified and commit to not repeating it. See how that goes.

Today’s Resource:

5 Tenets Of A Negative Breakup Recovery — a reality check on why the feel-good approach to breakups keeps failing and what actually works when you stop running from your pain.

As always, feel free to reply to this email and let me know what you think. I’ll do my best to get back to you promptly.

Until next time,
Max Jancar

A Weekly Email To Help You Unfuck Yourself Post-Breakup

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